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Saturday, March 27, 2010

Road trip anyone?


I got a killer killer deal on this recumbent bike today on ksl.com classifieds. Thanks for the research, Paco. You are a man among men... I've been pretty silent about coveting one of these for several years. That would account for why some of you may be gaping at this picture and asking yourself, "Where did THIS come from???" Now my obsession with Subarus--I'm not quite as private about that. I pretty much genuflect every time I pass one. Back to this bike--how COOL is it????????? I may take off across the U.S. on it!!!!!! At least to Bern. Idaho, that is.

Thursday, March 25, 2010

Move over, Hallmark...


I intercepted this note a while back and rediscovered it shoved back in my desk today looking for superglue:

Hey. Is everything OK?

No, but don't worry about me.

But I DO!!! Like I said, I think about you 24/7!! UR the only thing that makes me smile! When I am having a bad day or something's going on, UR the ONLY 1 I call or think about! So, yah, I'm gonna worry about ya cuz I care!!

UR the only thing I care about anymore, and I can't even take care of U so that's why I broke up with you.

U don't need to take care of me, Hun!!! Honest!!! But is that seriously Y U broke up w/me??!

I was a bad bf. Don't tell me I wasn't. I was. U deserve so much better than me, I think. Your friends think so, and I think U think so, so find a better guy to make U feel good.

I can't! UR the 1!!!! UR the 1!!! And UR a great guy to me!!!! Don't say UR not cuz U and I both know UR the best ever!! But now I kinda feel bad cuz I feel like I've made a fool out of myself and U. So let me tell this: UR my honey! U make me smile! UR all I can ever think about anymore. UR all I care about anymore. UR honestly what I've been looking 4!! Gosh, I'm crying. But U need 2 know that it doesn't matter what my friends say! So PLZ just ALWAYS remember that I love you and ALWAYS will!!!! So I hope U will feel the same about me after reading this!!! I love you!!! Always and 4Ever!!!

I love you, but...I DK. I guess I'm selfesh.

UR NOT selfish!!!!!

Yes I am.

Hun!!! NO!!! UR not!!!!

UR so beautiful today.

Thanks! UR hot!!

UR so beautiful.

Not really, but thanks.

End of note. I just have a few comments. First, nice use of commas before conjunctions and independent clauses. Second, what were you SUPPOSED to be doing while you were dropping all these Love Bombs??? And third, good luck with all of this. I sincerely wish you well.
Spring is in the air...even in 7th grade.

Friday, March 12, 2010

I Should Have Taken One Small Step


A couple of really really good stories I have should have turned into books which could have been released before the anniversary of the event, and I would have been stinking rich by now. The first one was my entire fourth grade year playing Lewis and Clark with my best friend, Gail, and my black cocker spaniel, Schwartzie--I was Lewis; Gail was Clark, and that left us a 4-legged Sacagewea--ever prone to wander off the path, stick his/her nose into unmentionable things, take off after a cat just after we'd asked him/her which river ford to take, and shirk off any papoose-like things we tied onto his/her back. Yep, I should have written that book and timed it to come out just in time to coincide with all the Lewis and Clark hoopla a few years back. But I didn't. AND then, I should have written the story of my summer babysitting 5 kids every day for 35 cents an hour and saving every single dollar in my mom's hankie drawer and buying contacts at the end of the summer--THE YEAR MAN WALKED ON THE MOON!!!! Drum roll...I still have THOSE original contacts in my eyes. I kid you not. THE VERY SAME ONES. This story has always been a showstopper. Someone usually asks, "And your prescription hasn't changed????" To which I reply, "Nope. I saw an eye doctor about a decade ago because my vision was kind of foggy. He said that if it happened again I should just rub them with a little toothpaste and rinse it off." He wanted to write me up for an eye journal. So both anniversaries have passed, and I am left un-millionaired. Why didn't I write those books???? They were practically written for me!!!!! I guess the answer is to project into the future, find something that will be celebrated in the next few years, and then get busy and write a best-seller from my life to correspond with it. Any ideas?????

Sunday, March 7, 2010

Paco's New Wheels!


Apparently this too!

Stand Up and Be Counted!!


Paco has a part-time employment gig with the Census Department ("Put down the five--carry the one"). At this point of the operation he's just delivering the forms. Actually I don't know much about what he's doing because he is under oath to only talk about it with other Census workers. Here in Brrrrrrr Lake (and its surrounding environs all the way into Star Valley over in Wyoming), it isn't unusual for 80% of the property owners in some communities to split for the winter (thus missing the BEST part about living here! HELLO!!!). To a conscientious census worker such as Paco who would NEVER think of skipping anyone this also means that the snow leading into all of these residences would hit him somewhere near his armpits. This, of course, necessitated the addition of skis and snowshoes to his work attire. I think we should get this word out. Can't you just picture some really smashing billboards of Paco delivering 2010 Census forms to cabins 3/4's of a mile off the beaten path? Cabins with snow covering mailboxes? It's publicity just waiting to happen! So last night he dreamed that a tion (tiger/lion) was guarding one of these houses. Fortunately for him he awakened before that tion grabbed his U.S. Census nametag and ripped it AND Paco to shreds...thus diminishing the U.S. Census count by one lowly Census taker...

Yes, THIS is a Tion!!! Incidentally I kid/compliment Paco by telling him that him passing out census forms is like a 5-star gourmet chef taking a job making peanut butter sandwiches in a daycare. But then--All work is honorable.--Brigham Young

Saturday, March 6, 2010

Company and Fish


It takes me a few whiles to adjust after the Olympics end. This video helped a little. If I were Canada, I'd be somewhat relieved that all the company was leaving and I could get back to knitting ski caps by the fire.

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

"It's All About the Cat..."


May the Seuss Go With You! Read Across America, America! I'm donning my Cat in the Hat suit today in spite of a 4% salary cut, zero operating funds in my classroom for next year most likely, and who knows what else will come down the pike as yet another obstacle in the march for education. I refuse to take the most buoyant, creative, personal, self-sctualizing profession and offer it up on the sacrificial bureacratic, political, de-personalized altar. I shall wear my suit in protest of all that has been done and WILL be done in the name of ever-raising standards and ever-plummeting funding. Hats off today to America's teachers who keep taking it in the gut...

Favorite books

  • Me 'n Steve
  • Thundering Sneakers
  • James Herriott's vet books
  • The Count of Monte Cristo
  • Travels with Charley
  • A Walk in the Woods
  • Peace Like a River
  • The Egg and I
  • Mary Poppins
  • Extremly Loud Incredibly Close
  • How Green Was my Valley