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Saturday, May 22, 2010

Eh...What's Up, Doc?


FOUND
--Liquid carrots. Still in their own ziplock bag under my car seat while looking for my camera which I haven't seen for two weeks.
--A bag of sheep fleece. Removed also from my car lest any passengers mistake my Windstar for a barn due to the smell. I put it over against the garage wall by the llama fleece someone generously gave me last week!
--18 coats. Discovered while cleaning in the coat closet. 18 divided by two (Mugsy keeps his coats upstairs) is 9. That's just wrong AND not the only closet.
--Mentos. Apprehended loitering in the cellar. A little hard but still intact and clean in their package and still minty.
--Beaker. Lost and complaining (Meep! Meep!!) and having landed himself wrongfully in a bag of puppets brought home from school.
--3 copies of Pay It Forward (the novel). Shall shortly add them to the box of 16 MORE in the cellar. What? You don't have 20 copies of a book in YOUR food storage?
-- Lunch Bag. From hmmmmm....Tuesday? Dumped out of car to garage floor yesterday so that I could cart women (two 95 years old! ) to Garden City for lunch.
--Fourth Apprentice!!! Yay!!! Ex lost library book!! Two down one to go!! Found at the bottom of the garage floor heap dumped for older women transport.
--Water bottle. Murky gray strings of mold? new life? suspended in the water.
--8 dvd's and a Glee cd (the second one--I've pretty much worn out "Smile" on track 12.)
--etc. etc. etc.
And this is only the first layer. This is the closest thing to a spring day we've had. Read it and weep. And at that, I'm in a down coat (found in fore-mentioned closet) because it was snowing earlier. Wait, I take back that first day of spring thing. Not. Nada. Cancelled. Any day greeted by a fire in our woodstove does NOT deserve to be called Spring.
In my own defense, the end of a school year ALWAYS brings piles and things to sort-Do I leave this in my classroom and hope the summer help/community service juvenile delinquents leave it alone? Should I move all this stuff in my classroom so the floor can get its once-a-year cleaning? Will I need this at home--hence, the plastic tub of "summer reading" which weighs upwards of 30 pounds? It wouldn't be so bad in the garage (well, actually yes it would. Garages are my PERSONAL LIVING HELL ON EARTH!!!! Ever year when I go to clean it, I have to recite this mantra: I love my husband. I love my husband. I love my husband. For some reason I think the garage is ALL his fault which it certainly couldn't possible be--maybe 75%) if it were only school and car junk. Some of it is Christmas stuff--3 Christmas trees, a bag of candles whose origin can only be described as foggy in my recollection, and some other assorted things. I also have to decide what to do with 10 pairs of blue jeans I found in a thrift store for $4. I think we're going to make sewless bags out of them. I need to make an executive decision about 3 plastic tubs of very mediocre Red Heart yarn leftover from some knitting classes I taught this year. There's a big old great yellow Tonka truck I bought for grandsons at the D.I. I also need to clear a better spot for my new recumbent bike. Oh, here's the last thing Paco just extracted from the back seat of the van because I left the door open--a small shivering Shih Tzu. He's on my lap now smelling slightly of outdoor spring smells. Mugsy, not Paco. All I can say is that it is a good thing our electric car is FIVE months late in coming...Perhaps by then we can carve out a corner for it. Sheesh...

4 comments:

Karrots said...

And a couple of sleeping teenagers you have to honk at to wake up.....:)

Mad Hadder said...

Why didn't I think of that my first time down? I hope I didn't scare Tanner when I just walked in. I was so surprised that door was open.

David and Shelly said...

so sorry you aren't having spring yet. Better not poke your head in OUR garage when you come, it isn't much better. AND it is being used as a tap studio!

Tom said...

well, I for one can deeply appreciate your clarification of "mugsy, not paco" at the end there. My favorite thing about reading your posts is to find the points of ambiguity that leave readers imagining the absurd. Well, done, Ma. Well, done.

Favorite books

  • Me 'n Steve
  • Thundering Sneakers
  • James Herriott's vet books
  • The Count of Monte Cristo
  • Travels with Charley
  • A Walk in the Woods
  • Peace Like a River
  • The Egg and I
  • Mary Poppins
  • Extremly Loud Incredibly Close
  • How Green Was my Valley